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Sex therapy => Sex Therapy => Topic started by: Trixxtur on July 02, 2016, 08:17:58 AM



Title: Does she prefer vibrators to sex with me?
Post by: Trixxtur on July 02, 2016, 08:17:58 AM
First, me and my wife have been married almost 26 years.  I love her more than anything in this world.  She cannot have an orgasm through sexual intercourse, and has always had that problem.  So years ago I bought her a vibrator for us to use to help her get off.  After our daughter was born she really had no sex drive and for years I pretty much had to beg for sex when I wanted it.  Fast forward 20 years.  She is now 46 and wants sex all the time and the vibrator collection has grown to 7 over the years.  I travel a lot and am gone for 4 days at a time for work, and I know she uses them when I'm gone, and I am totally o.k. with that.  However, 2 weeks ago, I came home and I could tell that she had used them and that weekend she said she didn't feel good and I was pretty much denied sex.  I was pissed to say the least.  Before that, I was home during the week and I play xbox, {yes, I'm 46 and play xbox, I'm basically just a big kid!}, and had my headset on and I got up to go to the bathroom.  On my way down the hall I heard her in the bathroom clearly using a vibrator.  It was kind of hot, so I stopped and listened for about 5 minutes, then I got pissed.  I mean, come on!!  I'm in the next room for God's sake!  So I purposely made noise to let her know that I was coming down the hall and I heard the vibrator stop and her scrambling to pull her jeans up.  I didn't say anything about it.  She has taken to reading romance novels and she says that it makes her horny.  I have never, ever denied her sex when she wanted it but she has denied me more times than I care to count.  We got into a big argument about the weekend when she didn't feel good, although I believe that she just wore herself out with the vibrators during that week is why she "didn't feel good."  We have had countless arguments about it over the years.  She even told me one time that there was no way I could do to her what a vibrator does and that was a humongous ego killer.  She told me last week to take them and throw them away because she doesn't want to have these arguments anymore.  But now I think she has ordered another one because she got a package in the mail yesterday and would not open it in front of me so I suspect she has another one.  Now, my question is am I just being paranoid, unreasonable?  Jealous of a machine for no reason?  I don't want her to not have pleasure, but then again, I don't want to be left out or denied sex because she would rather do it by herself.  I'm really confused and frustrated and just need some advice.  Thanks for listening.