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Author Topic: Female orgasm: A mystery  (Read 5041 times)
M.D.
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« on: July 18, 2009, 02:00:39 PM »

Hi everyone,
In the world of love and sex, getting a female to the height where she is most thrilled, excited, shivering, quivering and screaming in joy is not an easy task. Female orgasm is like make a fine music from violin as it has to be fine tuned before you can bring out any fine music. Getting a female to that orgasmic state is not impossible, just needs some learning, practice and a lot of patience like learning to play a violin. Once you learn it you never forget in your life and always  enjoy whether you put your hands on a violin or a women. Share your experiences and ask any questions.
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« Last Edit: September 12, 2009, 02:26:33 PM by M.D. » Logged

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Calypso
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« Reply #1 on: June 19, 2011, 05:56:51 PM »

Hello Karma

Female orgasm isn't only a mystery to men but to many women as well.  I know that sounds strange but I'm a 51 year old woman and I am have a great deal of difficulty reaching orgasm at this time in my life and I have no idea why.  I do well when I am alone and masturbating but when I am with my partner that is where things just don't seem to work well.  He is a wonderful person and is very attentive to my needs and communicates well about all things including and especially about sex. I love him greatly and am at ease with him but I have only reached orgasm 2 times with him and never with intercourse only with oral sex once and once by me rubbing my clitoris and him fingering me (sorry about the language but I don't know how else to say it).  My partner is a heavy man and so am I and both of us have lost a lot of weight but still have more to go, I say this as I feel that our bodies do get in the way for my satisfaction.  I also am wondering if it is my age, I am 51 and my partner is 29 tomorrow.  He has some problems with lasting long enough and both of us are sympathetic to each others short commings as it were. I blame him for nothing and he blames me for nothing, we just do our best to make our sexual experiences as well as all of our time together the best that it can be.  We have been together for a year as of July 1st and still I have only had 2 orgasms with my love and it is so frustrating for both of us.  He is not that experienced with sex as he has not had but only 2 other partners and they were short term.  I am his longest experience.  We communicate well with each other but I do suffer some embarassment from time to time but do eventually get things said.  However, I do find it somewhat difficult to tell him exactly how to give me pleasure as I don't want to spend our time telling him "a little to the left, no, less pressure, oh okay, do little circles with your fingers" and stuff like that but it seems that that is part of what he wants me to do.  But the problem with that is that it takes my mind away and I cannot concentrate on feeling good and then cannot reach orgasm.  I want to help him help me but I am at a loss.  I have always had some problems reaching orgasm as I was sexually abused and most of my relationships have been bad so I feel there is a lot of emotional stuff that I have to wade through while we are enjoying each other.  However, I love sex and my partner so this is why I am at such a loss.  Please help me!!!!!!
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« Reply #2 on: June 27, 2011, 07:50:11 PM »

Hey there,
Welcome to the forum and sharing your story. You are not alone with your story, many women who were sexually abused has hard time getting orgasm. There are also several other factors playing role in here, he is inexperienced, both of you are overweight which makes libido low and a little age difference.
But, I am glad that both of you are getting along very well and that is the key. There is nothing wrong in teaching him, what do you like and how do you get orgasm. When time goes by he will learn the way you like it and both of you will get better and will be able to get orgasm. He might be self conscious about his body and therefore has performance issues. He might wanna see a doctor and get a prescription for medication for erectile dysfunction( though he might not have ED). The best thing is to love each other and understand and you guys are doing great in that. Time is the best healer and the key, I am pretty sure you will get better, just sit down with him and tell him what do you want and he will learn.
Take care and keep us posted.
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« Reply #3 on: August 13, 2011, 05:34:01 PM »

My partner is having a lot of difficulty reaching the "big" orgasm.  She may have a couple small ones, but cannot always achieve the big one.  This frustrates her no end.  Our foreplay usually lasts at least a half hour because she says she needs that kind of time, which is no problem to me because I really enjoy it all.  But even with all kinds of stimulation, she just can't achieve the big one, as she calls it, all the time.  Sometimes she ends up getting nasty about it, for which she apologizes.  I love her so much and I want to help her with this.  What can I do?  Our relationship is awesome and much of our sex life awesome, too.  Help!
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« Reply #4 on: August 13, 2011, 08:36:53 PM »

Hi there,
Thanks for sharing your story. With your little description I can't really figure out whats wrong here. Can you tell me a little bit more about you guys and your relationship? Did she ever have any "big" orgasm with you or anyone else and what makes it happens.
Take care,
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« Reply #5 on: August 14, 2013, 03:28:09 PM »

I've been dating a lady in her 20's. She has never had an orgasm. She began having sex at 13. She said she had sex just because sometimes. She doesn't masturbate. Doesn't like to. She says she enjoys pleasing her partner more than she likes to be pleased. We have sex for quite a long time. 25 to 35 mins. I make sure I warm her up first. She's lubricated. We used sex toys before. Nothing works. I try to get her to relax with me and she is. We communicate well. I gave her no reason not to trust me. We are in love and plan to marry next year. I already bought the ring. But it aches me that she doesn't come during sex. I try to make her as comfortable as possible. Please help.
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« Reply #6 on: August 30, 2013, 08:50:08 PM »

Sometimes it could be psychological as she started having sex at a very early stage and that early experience may have been traumatic for her both physically and mentally. Ask her if she had any bad experience in past and if she can lighter her heart, may be she can enjoy.
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« Reply #7 on: September 27, 2014, 05:04:19 AM »

should be a woman to know really
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« Reply #8 on: October 13, 2014, 01:41:27 PM »

To sex-meeting,
Do you have any insight, you would like to shed some light on this issue?
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